there is more to this story by doing this via phone in the mall is tedious
12/14/2008So I went to the mall for the holidays and all that. My list was pretty short and my girlies was long, so I had some time to kill.
Enter the Dianetics booth. I submitted to a stress test and I was asked about what I knew about Scientology, since they could tell I was lulzing them. (“Hell yeah I wanna stress test! Hook that shit upppppp!!!!!”)
So I told the short version of the jack parsons story, and the lady was all sorts of interested as well as repelled, that I must have made it up, but it was too weird to be fiction.
Anyways I took the test and held those metal things, and they asked me to think about people in my life. I thought about my girly, and the needled moved. She said that’s it that’s where there is stress in you life. To which I replied that it doesn’t take machines to be able to tell that every guy who is waiting on his girlfriend to finish shopping is stressed out.
She asked me what I did for a living and told her I sold occult books. She asked if I did magic and what kind I did. I had a hard time saying “I kill people” so I went with the mysterious answer instead, which I suppose turns out to be much more scary.
I got a free dianetics dvd and I promised id watch it. I probably won’t.
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